.malaise.

It has been a while since I’ve last posted… mostly because nothing of any real note has been happening lately.  There are some weeks where I feel like all I do is get up, go to work, come home, eat, go to bed.  It’s the same litany my father uses when I talk with him on the weekends.  “How was your week?”  “You know.  Got up, went to work, came home, ate, went to bed.”  I never realized, until now, how suffocating that sentence is.

[On a sidenote, I feel the need to clarify something.  As I mentioned in my last post, I am a Cancer: ruled by the moon, a bundle of contradictions, emotional, &etc.  Which is to say that I am aware that sometimes I write about how I adore my job and I’m lucky to be there, and sometimes I write about how I can’t believe I work a 9 to 5 and have to wear a suit.  There are days when I couldn’t be more satisfied, and days when I am ready to quit.  This is probably true of most people in most jobs, but it is particularly true of me and mine.  Do I contradict myself?  Very well, then, I contradict myself.  I am large, I contain multitudes.  Thank you Mr. Whitman.]

In any case, to move on to happier things… Finn and Cali and another friend and I went out dancing last weekend.  For some reason there is no longer a “ladies night” around here on Saturdays, so we ended up going to this little club in the middle of nowhere which drew quite the colorful clientele.  There were the hipsters, who clearly found the place to be just ironic enough to make it worth being seen there; the older lesbians, who made us all grin ear to ear with their unabashed just-wanna-have-fun dancing; and, oddly, one shirtless gay man who was hired to walk around offering us all test tube shots.  I was exhausted and had been hesitant to go, but Finn never agrees to go out dancing so I couldn’t possibly pass up the opportunity.  (Finn broke her foot when we were walking to my apartment one day, very early in our relationship, and – despite the pain, not knowing it was broken – continued to walk around on it for another 3 months before she got an X-ray.  It didn’t heal properly, and it still hurts her sometimes… so that was the end of dancing for her.  OR WAS IT????  Word on the street is, she might have gotten her mojo back last weekend.  To be confirmed.)

So anyway, dancing was good.  Then came this week of boredom and lethargy, broken only by my attendance at Holiday Handjobs, a queer craft fair.

And so here I am.  Taking a mental health day (because of the boredom, and because it will give me a four day weekend, and because we get so many vacation days that it’s a wonder anyone is ever there at all.)   Plans for the weekend include helping our friend Gem pack and move, brunch with Cali, sleep, and writing.

Oh, and last but not least, shoutout to Rev who just started what promises to be a pretty kickass blog about her adventures and misadventures trying to get ordained as a big ‘ol queer in the Presbyterian church.  Should be lots of good reflection about the intersection between religion and spirituality, so if you’re interested in reading or being a part of that dialogue, you should head that way.

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3 Comments

Filed under Cali, Finn, Gem, ohmygod i'm a lawyer, queering the binary, Rev

3 responses to “.malaise.

  1. presbyqueerian

    ::blushes:: thanks for the shout-out!

  2. leo

    yo! i was at holiday handjobs too! we must be neighbors!

  3. pomegranate

    ha! it’s a small, small world my friend. love it.

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